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DBT skills to use when feelings move faster than you can think.
Some moments go from manageable to overwhelming in seconds: a craving, a flash of anger, a conversation that turns. Dialectical behavior therapy (DBT) offers practical skills built for exactly those moments. Erin L. Smith, MSPC, LPCC, LPC uses DBT skills inside individual therapy, alongside the strength-based, cognitive-behavioral and solution-focused work at the center of her style. Sessions take place in Georgetown, KY or by telehealth for people located in Kentucky, Arizona or Minnesota.
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Acceptance and change, held together
The word 'dialectical' points to a balance at the heart of DBT: two things that seem opposed can both be true. You are doing the best you can with what you have right now, and some patterns still need to change. Holding only the first can slide into staying stuck. Holding only the second can turn into constant self-criticism. DBT skills keep both in view, so you can accept where you are without giving up on where you want to be. That balance runs through every skill that follows.
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Getting through the hardest few minutes
Distress tolerance skills are for moments when emotion is running so high that solving the problem is not possible yet. The goal is smaller and more urgent: get through the next few minutes without making things worse. That might mean slowing your breathing to shift your body's state, turning your attention elsewhere on purpose, soothing your senses, or weighing what acting on the urge would cost you later. Mindfulness runs underneath all of it, because noticing a wave as it builds is what gives you a choice about what comes next.
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Understanding emotions before they peak
Emotion regulation skills work further upstream. They start with naming what you feel with some precision, since 'bad' and 'stressed' cover a lot of ground. They include noticing what leaves you more exposed, such as short sleep, skipped meals or a long stretch without rest. They also ask whether an emotion fits the facts of the situation. When it does not, and following the urge would make things worse, DBT teaches opposite action: gently doing the opposite of what the emotion urges, so the feeling has less to feed on.
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Staying in the conversation
Interpersonal effectiveness skills are for the moment when every part of you wants to walk out, shut down or say the thing you cannot take back. They give you a structure for asking for what you need, saying no without starting a war, and keeping your self-respect while still caring for the relationship. These skills look simple on paper and feel very different under pressure, which is why they are rehearsed rather than only explained. Tension with a partner, a relative or a coworker can all become places to practice, at a pace you choose.
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How Erin uses DBT skills in individual sessions
With Erin, DBT skills are tools chosen for what you bring, not a curriculum to get through. They might come up for anxiety that spikes without warning, anger that arrives fast, cravings, or conflict that keeps repeating. A skill can sit alongside CBT, mindfulness or other methods in the same hour, depending on what the week has held. Each one is explained plainly before you try it, nothing is used without your agreement, and Erin asks you directly which skills are earning their place and which ones to drop.
Skills like these may fit if
- Feelings go from calm to overwhelming fast
- Urges feel impossible to sit through
- Conflict makes you shut down or explode
- You want something concrete to practice
Skills are chosen with you and practiced at a pace you agree to.
Questions
Common questions
- Can I learn DBT skills in individual therapy?
- Yes, that is how Erin uses them. Skills come into your sessions as they become relevant, explained in plain language and shaped around situations from your own life. You decide together which ones are worth practicing, and Erin will check with you about whether they are actually helping.
- Can DBT skills be used for anger or cravings?
- They can be part of that work. Distress tolerance and emotion regulation skills are designed for urges that arrive fast, whether the urge is to shout, to drink or to leave. Anger management and addiction are among the areas where Erin has the most experience.
- What is the difference between DBT and CBT?
- DBT grew out of cognitive behavioral therapy and keeps its practical focus, but gives acceptance an equal place beside change. Where CBT tends to test whether a thought is accurate, DBT skills are for riding out a painful moment, steadying an emotion or handling a hard conversation as it happens. Erin may draw on both.
In Erin's words
What she would say if you called today.
Before we use any skill, I will tell you what it is for and why I think it fits you, and nothing happens without your agreement. We set the goals together. I will ask you directly what is helping, and if a skill does not fit your life, we let it go.
Free 15-minute consultation
Book a consultation with Erin
Fifteen minutes by telehealth, at no charge. You can describe what is going on, ask how Erin works, and decide afterward whether to book a first session. Scheduling opens in her secure SimplePractice portal.
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